Those Accounts Again: Someone Smells Something Fishy...

Among the Far-Right, some things are just painfully predictable: Paul “Green Arrow” Morris loses yet more of his coterie of writers until he's reduced to publishing the addled rantings of religious fundamentalists who seem to have taken time out from the 16th Century to knock up a quick post for him (in Latin, too-for all the sense they make). Over on the BDF we can enjoy the regular spectacle of Simon Bennett suffering a succession of vein-popping meltdowns as the mighty political juggernaut that is the British Freedom Party (33 members and counting...) disintegrates like a canoe made of Rizlas. We can also, as ever, thank the Heavens for the Gift of Laughter that is Nick Griffin's idea of a finely-honed political machine as he appoints a new Yorkshire and Humber Organiser in the crumpled shape of Ian Kitchen, a man best known for dressing (in what looked like a survival blanket and a colander) as “Saint George” (and who's less-than-pedestrian favoured pastime is said to be producing unusual “home movies” with the assistance of his elderly - but enthusiastic and supple, I'm assured - Missus).

Oh, and the Truth Truck still hasn't been spotted... (Apparently, it needs tax, MoT and a service. To suggest it also needs buying back from Adlorries.com Ltd is, frankly, potentially libellous and quite beneath me.)

And just as predictably, as soon as Mr Griffin thought the travails of the past year were over and he could begin to relax, enjoy a bacon roll, breathe freely, enjoy another bacon roll, put his feet up (and enjoy another bacon roll because the other two were so moreish...), he's in the mire again.

But this time it's serious.

The Electoral Commission, having waited longer for a look at the BNP Accounts than some us have had to wait for a new series of Nurse Jackie, have decided the document merits a “formal review”, in light of the fact that even the Nazi's own auditors weren't entirely convinced by them, and (in a separate issue to the Accounts) the revelation that one of Griffin's favoured (although not favoured enough to have escaped Jim Dowson's insulting “20p in the Pound” offer to call it quits) printers is still owed £15k for election printing.

A bill that should have been settled – by law – within a month of the 2010 General Election.

Unsurprisingly, the E.C's Investigators have also noticed (and are less than impressed by) a few “gaps” in the “Accounts”. They'd quite like to know where the money went.

So give yourselves a slap on the back: If it weren't for people like yourselves contacting the E.C with tip-offs, information and suggestions, the “Accounts” might have been quietly filed away and forgotten about.

Just as Griffin and Co were hoping...