a loss for words

You know. I'm just human. That being said, I have to wonder about others. Others around me. How people reflect on life, emotions, relations, religion, death etc.

I keep the subjects current in all my relationships. With Sara, with my mother and with friends. And yet, I can't help but feel, or at least wonder, if I really think like others around me.

I just don't have the answers to life and death, nor do I aspire to do so any time soon. But I sort life gently, trying not to hurt other peoples feelings. And I am being fully honest when I say that most times I upset someone, it is because I said the wrong thing, when that thing was supposed to make things rights. Being human is about mistakes, overcoming them just so you can make new mistakes.

I wonder...

when all is said and done. Will I have learned something?

and more importantly. What point is a lifetime of mistakes, if the final result is that you won't be able to use what you have learned, to be a better person?

Of course...

hopefully..

there is a after life..

Sometimes, I wonder...

lets say there is a God. But there is no heaven or hell. You just wake up after life, in a identical world, with the small difference, that you now know that nobody ever really dies. We just wake up, and God tells us,

"yes I told you that you would die,

so you would know how to appreciate life.

How else was I to teach that valuable lesson to you?"